"Someday's gonna be a busy day..."

Monday, 15 February 2010

Defeated by a pork chop

As long as I'm not exhausted, I adore cooking. But I'm the first to admit that my meat preparation skills aren't the greatest. Give me some veggies, tofu or noodles and I can whip you up a meal you'd go down on your knees to thank me for, but when it comes to the meaty stuff, well, it's sometimes better if we just let the dog eat it.

For example, last night I met my Waterloo with two humble pork chops. I was tired after a busy week of chasing Jady Lady, super-crawling baby, but I started off feeling fairly optimistic: the receipe was simple, had lots of good ratings online and called for only 5 ingredients. The evening ended with me forcibly swearing that I would never again buy pork chops, no matter how economical they were.

It doesn't seem to matter how I prepare the darned things - they always taste like cardboard. I've marinated, roasted, grilled and fried them. I've covered them in sauces and gravies. Once I even attempted to crockpot them but we all know my feelings about the cursed crockpot.

Same with roast beef. My Nana could cook a roast beef so tender and juicy you only needed a fork to eat it with; my Mom made awesome pot roasts. Me? I cook them so rare that only bears enjoy them, or else cook the hell out of them so they taste like boiled leather. My yorkshire puddings are always tasty, but that's a small consolation when you've promised your man a roast beef dinner and end up feeding him fried eggy dough instead.

Chicken seems to be the one meat I can cook without constantly wrecking it, although it's mainly because I throw it on the BBQ or poach it. And the irony? I really, really loathe chicken.

So if anyone out there has a no-fail scheme for cooking pork chops so they're not as dry as a popcorn fart, please - I beg you - tell me your secret! Otherwise my husband will be eating tofu for the rest of the month.


Lois said...

Hi Kim.
This is no fail...I promise.
Take your porkchops, preferably boneless BUT NOT fast fry ones, and sprinkle some garlic and onion powder and lemon pepper if you have any on both sides.
Add a little butter, just a bit,to a large frying pan with a lid. Put in the chops and cook them until they are brown on both sides. DON'T KEEP TURNING THEM!Let them cook until one side is brown then turn until the next side is brown. You can add a bit (or a lot if you like it) more butter to the pan if you want. Once the chops are brown remove them from the pan. Take 1 can of mushrooms or fresh ones if you prefer and stir fry them in the pan for a few minutes. Now add 1 can of mushroom soup (DON'T use No-Name brand soup) and 1 cup of milk into the pan,stir everything together, add the chops back into the pan and spoon sauce over them. Turn pan on LOW cover with lid,and let simmer for a half hour. Serve with mashed potatoes or rice.YUMMY!
I promise this will be really good!

Kimber said...

Lois, the irony of your comment is making my teeth hurt. THAT IS THE RECIPE I TRIED. At least, I browned 'em, added some veggies and mushroom soup. AND IT STILL TASTED LIKE CRAP!

This just reinforces the fact that I am not meant to cook pork ever again. But thanks anyway.

Lois said...

Kim, you kill me! LOL!
Sorry, but I never heard of this pork chop recipe not working.
I agree with you....keep pork off your fork and you should do OK.