1) Eat roast beef that looks and tastes like boiled leather.
2) Host: What do you take in your coffee?
Me: Cream and sugar, if you have it.
Host: How about skim and sweetener?
3) Allow myself to be kissed on the lips by people who aren't family.
4) Share my chapstick/lipbalm/lipstick.
5) Act grateful when someone presents me with a Tim Horton's gift certificate or product.